Comments for Should more babies be taken into care? at http://www.careleavers.com , comment 1 to 13 out of 13 comments http://www.careleavers.com Fri, 10 Sep 2010 23:04:02 +0100 FeedCreator 1.7.3 http://www.careleavers.com/blog/should-more-babies-be-take-into-care-.html#comment-110 If after working with the family closely, and i mean closely, i think a child should be removed and placed into care, if all other resorces have been tried and failed, for example having the extended family members given the opputunity to care for the child with support. I am a child of the care system, and a grandmother who is raising a grandchild, now, and i would say, you need support from the right source, not necessary the SS, before the child is taken into care. i wish i had been given the chance to be brought up in a familly before i was placed in care. - Lynne Mon, 10 May 2010 16:50:36 +0100 http://www.careleavers.com/blog/should-more-babies-be-take-into-care-.html#comment-105 Hi all, Thanks for your comments, this is a really interesting discussion. Kim, obviously has a lot of experience of the care system and has a view on what is right and wrong. However, I'm not sure that Nicola is moping about and feeling sorry for herself, but just expressing a view on this issue. Anyway, what do others think about this subject? It is really interesting to hear everyone's views. - Victoria Fri, 12 Mar 2010 11:47:53 +0100 http://www.careleavers.com/blog/should-more-babies-be-take-into-care-.html#comment-104 Thankyou Nicola for your comments. I think I understand you and whilst I profoundly disagree with you I do have enough empathy about me to understand the pain that you endured as a youngster. The thing is not to marinate ourselves in feelings of self-pity but to do something about the thousands of poor children who remain hidden from view in a society that seems careless of care. Whilst I hope you don't think that I blame you personally for the deaths of infants and youngsters the mindset you display allows child cruelty to occur unchallenged. I would rather many children were placed in care than have anymore Baby P cases. So, yes, Nicola I'll be judgemental for 2 reasons. Firstly I have 10 years of first hand experience of being in care and secondly I know the difference between right and wrong. You, it seems, are unsure and would probably like to mope about feeling sorry for yourself. Start thinking about the up coming generation. - Kim Baish Thu, 11 Mar 2010 20:53:16 +0100 http://www.careleavers.com/blog/should-more-babies-be-take-into-care-.html#comment-103 I would like to say that Kim Baish is not conveying herself to be diplomatic or caring with the situation Abby Burrows has described about her own personal experiances and pain of being seperated from her mother whom she obviously loved very much despite her mums illness. I too was bought up by an ill mother with the same problem..paranoid-schizophrenic ..the act of being taken was traumatic and is still raw to this day....35 years later....I have a family of my own....but a day does not go paast when I greive for the little girl and mother that faced seperation....that feeling is NOT WRONG....broken or disfunctional is not the question....I had to be seperated from my mum becuase she was dangerous....No one is required to SIT ON THE SIDELINES....I would have liked the chance to see my mum under supervised conditions....alas this option wasnt provided back in those days.70's I have thankfully turned out just about sane from my experiances and have the forsite to understand my mothers cause in all this...I'd also like to point out to Kim that its not Abbys fault....she is expressing her feelings whivh will be fueled by a childs experiance of slosing her mother....its amazing how much a gap you find in your life when someone as important isnt there....so Miss Baish....you are completely and utterly wrong for being so judgemental......I can agree with Abby as thats what it would have FELT like. .....abit less judgement and abit more EMPATHY PLEASE....surely every persons case is different....care should not be the first instance ...it may have worked for you but there should be more calls for family support...day visits and slow process depending on individual case as was practised in my day..not everyone is evil...and dont get me started on muscular Christians as social workers. ......please - nicola page Thu, 11 Mar 2010 13:05:12 +0100 http://www.careleavers.com/blog/should-more-babies-be-take-into-care-.html#comment-99 So Abby Burrowes thinks that taking children away from their birth parents is, "a wicked and sinister type of human cruelty." I can assure you that, in my experience. it is far more cruel for society to sit on the sidelines and watch a family struggle, disintegrate and finally one, or more of the children, suffer real harm. Sorry Abby you are completely and utterly wrong. Good luck with your medical studies. I hope however you're never ever in a situation where your intervention is required to remove a child from a broken and dysfunctional family. You, it seems to me, would sit on your hands. - Kim Baish Sat, 13 Feb 2010 08:34:58 +0100 http://www.careleavers.com/blog/should-more-babies-be-take-into-care-.html#comment-95 dear sir, have you had a frontal lobe labotomy?! what idiocity to belive for a second that more kids should be in care! my mother was a schizophrinic. i missedan alful lots if school and education. it was just me and mum at home, the odd aunty helped unwillinly and periodicaly. i hated her going in hospital as i would go in to care for three weeks or three months. pure hell! they didnt give bith to me, breast feed me, cry and wurry over me. my mother, no matter how incopletely, did. i was extreamly bright dispite my lack of schooling and hated social workers, form the tender age of seven to this very day. i am now prepering to go to medical school to become a gp, i passed my science alevels with flying colours as an adult,i am separated with three beautifll children of my own. ive had my problems but i fermly belive,that to cut a child from its biological mother unless in extreamly abusive situations, is not only shortsighted but a wicked and sinister type of human cruelty, to say the veryleast. wake up people! respect to ian joseph. - abby burrowes Tue, 26 Jan 2010 21:20:05 +0100 http://www.careleavers.com/blog/should-more-babies-be-take-into-care-.html#comment-27 It really depends on the situation. I feel that some parents need to be supported and given the opportunities to become better parents. Parenting does not come with a manual and actually many care leavers become parents at a young age. I was in care from 9 until 21 and did not have much contact with family members... this had a huge impact on me and has meant that i have struggled to form trusting relationships with people as i recognise i have attachment issues. I now work with young people who have been excluded from schools/PRU's, many children and young people in the care system. I also work with their parents/carers of these young people who themselves have had difficult early experiences. Unless we try to break the cycle, more and more children will end up in the care system. We as communities need to take responsibility too. - rajinder manku Wed, 11 Nov 2009 14:31:18 +0100 http://www.careleavers.com/blog/should-more-babies-be-take-into-care-.html#comment-26 I agree there are so many children that should not be living with there parents who just don't live up to the job!!! What a job for social services. What we must remember as in all walks of live there are good people and not so good people, those that are good at there job's and those that are not. Those social workers that are good at there jobs will make good choices for the children in there care......But what about the one's that are not good at the job, these people have the hand of god to take children from the arms of possibley loving parents. To those of us that love and adore our children this thought is imaginable, could you imagine some one taking you child? We all need to try and create a better care system for vunrable children. - Donna Gent Fri, 06 Nov 2009 22:50:19 +0100 http://www.careleavers.com/blog/should-more-babies-be-take-into-care-.html#comment-25 I also believe that more children should pass through the care system. - Isis Sat, 10 Oct 2009 21:27:17 +0100 http://www.careleavers.com/blog/should-more-babies-be-take-into-care-.html#comment-24 I really believe that more children should pass through the care system. There are many families that have ceased to function in any meaningful way and as a result childrens' life opportunities are being badly affected. I went through the care system and it saved me. My family was completely dysfunctional. My mother was a paranoid-schizophrenic and my father was feckless. No social worker could have helped my family. No teacher could have helped me into University. All three kids needed taking out of the home before change could be affected. Bring back muscular Christians as social workers. - Kim Baish Thu, 01 Oct 2009 11:54:57 +0100 http://www.careleavers.com/blog/should-more-babies-be-take-into-care-.html#comment-23 I find this question could be challenging b and complex for social workers to consider should more babies be taken into care? Emotionally I still find the thought babies being removed from parents very unsettling as it stirs up the some of my lived through painful memories for me as this happened to me. The children hood I experienced being placed in care as a newborn baby and remained there in different types of residential children s home and the many primary care givers until I left care at the care system 16 years old. I had no contact or involvement with my birth parents or knew much about my family or some of my siblings.One surfaced in adulthood. So in many regards I recall being parent less not belonging to a real family or understanding my place of birth origin and strongly recall uncomfortably realizing belonging to the local care authority whom made all the decisions about my well being and journey through out my childhood years. Being raised in care can be traumatic ordeal for the child far from a normal family life, I was sexually abused in care for several years so for some individuals like my self the uncertainly and changes in placements through not fault of your own can be disturbing and distressing .It was not always a loving nurturing caring environment and reality that sometimes staff do not act in the best interest of the children under their duty of care. Some certainly where child focused outstanding in caring for groups of children and excellent role models caused no harm but still I say can not replace a parent . I say this because I have raised my children successfully to adults and understand have a few insights to the parenting journey and struggles you may encounter, always trying to do ones best for your children. So should more babies go into care? As a society we should ask is the care environment offering the best possible care for that baby to reach its full potential it is more about their interest being paramount the main priority. Can all care providers consistently provide and meet the needs of the individual baby of the highest standard?. Or should more human resources be made available to the birth family that may make a significant difference to the child's development and outcomes. I agree with a previous comment that only the worse cases of child abuse in all its different complex forms, then certainly those babies should be removed from their parents care and placed in care. It about the degree of risk and harm and the cumulative damaging effects on that child.We should never be complacent or negligent. This requires expert professional decision making from the various child welfare teams responsible in delivering services to the family. My preference is for babies taken into care under 2 years of age with no hope of returning to birth parents or keeping the birth family connected is for in those circumstances is for the baby to be adopted. I wish my local authority had made that difficult decision on my behalf when I was under their care. Why I think I would have been less damaged as a child and more likely to have felt loved wanted as a child and accepted. Does the research evidence back this up? And better outcomes in all aspects of life.? This is my personal reflection as a grandma. We all desire quality good parenting looking after every child whether in care or raised by parents every child deserves that right. - Elizabeth Wed, 30 Sep 2009 19:52:33 +0100 http://www.careleavers.com/blog/should-more-babies-be-take-into-care-.html#comment-22 The article below is from The Guardian (30/09/09). It is written by care leaver Dawn Hawley and offers a view about when and if children should be taken into care. Taking families 'into care' is a better option for children Only in the worst cases of child abuse should babies be taken into care sooner As a care leaver, the statement by Barnardo's chief executive Martin Narey about the need to take more babies into care really struck a chord with me. I don't agree with such a sweeping statement, because the reasons why families break down are varied and complex, but I can understand his statement – another response to another unbelievable case such as that of Baby Peter. However, child protection does not cover one type of child. Every case must be examined individually, and very carefully. View the full article here: http://www.careleavers.com/general/165-intocare - Victoria Wed, 30 Sep 2009 07:00:53 +0100 http://www.careleavers.com/blog/should-more-babies-be-take-into-care-.html#comment-21 It's a very difficult question. Having been in care for most of my life I can speak from my own experience. I was taken into care at a few months old and stayed with my foster family for the first four years of my life, at four my mother took me back home. I was greeted by seven siblings that I didn't know, I had been an only child in the foster family so it was a bit overwhelming, about a year later my mum decided she couldn't cope and off I went again, not to my original foster family I may add. After numerous placements age ten I was sent back to my mum, who I had only seen once in the previous six years. She was an alcoholic, had severe mental health issues and was a prostitute. Inevitably this didn't work out and I was then taken back into care, several more placements until age 18. I have since found out that my original foster family wanted to adopt me but my mother refused. I truly believe that my life would have been a lot easier and happier had I been taken from my mother at birth. I think it is cruel to leave children with people who put their children at risk only for the sake of keeping the 'family' together. It was obvious that my mother was incapable of caring for me and her other seven children, she admits that she never wanted children and was made to feel guilty by social services for not wanting us. If children are identified as being at risk the parent should be given one chance to show that they can adequately care for their child, if it doesn't happen the child should be given the opportunity to be adopted and cared for by a family that wants and loves them. I know a lot of people will disagree with this approach but the alternative is far worse. The decision should be taken as soon as possible in order to prevent children going back and forth to a bad parent and numerous placements in the 'care' system. - paula rutherford Fri, 25 Sep 2009 07:01:35 +0100